Tear Jerkers

Why am I sitting here watching “Stepmom” on TBS’s Movie and a Makeover?

Could be lots of things. My S.O. lawyer is hours away in the stix, chasing cases. A is upstairs taking a nap for just an hour. And here is my To Do List…from yesterday:

Want To Do Today:
Laundry
Start working on class stuff (reading, planning, grading)
Call about brakes and get estimates
Figure out what to do about car tire
Oil change
Cook Dinner
Enter receipts and organize bills
Send packages to parents and in-laws
Draft abstract for conference and email to co-chair
Draft ideas for journal submission
Grant report plan developed
Email bookkeeping: Answer emails, etc.
Eat Lunch!!!

Can Realistically Do Today:

Notice: I didn’t list anything under the realistic category. What ended up being realistic is that I 1)ate lunch and 2) watched “Just Like Heaven.”

There is something incredibly disturbing about the mesmerizing effect that Julia Roberts and Reese Witherspoon movies have on me at my most depressed moments. Cursed Hollywood machine! Where are those damn tissues…

But even worse is that I humbled myself to call the mother-in-law to see if we (A and I) could just come over and hang out. If she was home, she let the voicemail get it. If she got home, she didn’t call me back. What is it? I didn’t invite her over for a second time when my parents were here? I should shop more at Nameless Chain Store just to say hi? There’s a big, bad, social faux pas around every corner and I’m mugged by every one of them.

Times like these, I try to envision the space and frame of mind I would be in if I could be anywhere, doing anything. My visions are all about feeling and looking beautiful, inside and out.

Guess I shouldn’t have that second helping of blackberry cobbler.