I'm not disappearing. Just in a weird space. It's possibly just that time in the semester when things speed up. Or maybe the reality that I have not spent much time working on who I am in this new job. Whatever the case may be, I haven't felt much like writing. I am working on conceptual things, though. Like the concept of time as a gift rather than time as an enemy (marching on and all that).
I think it is precisely at moments like these that I will try my damned-est to push on through whatever is making me feel lethargic, whether a cold (as currently) or pms or general disappointment about the state of how much I have not accomplished in my life up to this point....
And there it is. Damn! I knew there was a reason I was staying away from writing. I guess I haven't wanted to deal with the fact that I'm depressed about turning 35. I'm not sure where I was supposed to have gotten to by now, but I sure feel like I didn't get there.
The thing I will focus on most in these coming days is making peace with who I am and knowing that time IS a gift. As long as I have another day, another minute on the planet, I have more time to do better, be better and contribute more.
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2 comments:
I must tell you how refreshing it is to read your writing. You are NOT disappearing... your are MORE alive than ever and 35 is such a blessing... it IS a gift... it's more time!!!
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